I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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