cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Randomize