she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize