Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Randomize
