there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize