so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
