god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
You pole danced in your parka.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
The adults are the big ones right?
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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