I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Randomize
