after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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