the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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