TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
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He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
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Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..