Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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