did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
