isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
