i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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