He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
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