o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
