So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
