i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
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