ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
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Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
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I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
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