YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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