wanna go halves on a baby?
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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