Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Randomize