We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
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