is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
