Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
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