So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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