You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Randomize
