Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
