why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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