I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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