spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
