we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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