don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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