i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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