I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
grandma shit on top of the toilet
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
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