did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Randomize
