i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
