you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
