That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
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