Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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