girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
