You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I'm passing your future prison.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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