I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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