We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
we're so committed to being not committed
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Randomize
