elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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