Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
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