im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize