I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
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