He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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