i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
my poor anus
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
